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PRÓXIMA PARADA: PARIS – DUBLIN – LONDRES

PRÓXIMA PARADA: PARIS – DUBLIN – LONDRES


This show contains inappropriate language
and may not be suitable for all audiences. That’s how it goes! While our water tank is being filled,
let me tell you our world tour starts now! And I want you to keep up.
It’s several episodes. You will love it. Let’s go on our little rock trip? Let’s go, we are late. -Can we go?
-Yes, we’re up. -Let’s hit it. Come on up!
-Stay focused! Let’s get dressed,
so we’re off to Europe, Daddy-o. Hey, macho, let’s run because we’re late,
we’re off to the airport. That’s João Neto. My Louro José. I mean, my press agent.
He’s been my friend for a long time. And we are so close
that he calls me in a cute way: Macho. You’ll take two shorts
and tank-top, macho? Winter there will be 3.2 F in the sauna. Do you take me for a fool? -Well.
-I’m taking a toque, asshole. Yeah, Daddy, now we’re talking. That’s why I like you.
That’s the one. World tour, macho.
Let’s move it up, macho. Morning, Avelino. Move it. Morning, Avelino. That’s Avelino. My bodyguard.
Just as Captain Nascimento’s mission was to ensure the Pope’s rest,
his is to ensure mine. Besides that, he likes me
more than my own parents. That’s why instead of Whindersson,
he calls me a much prettier name: 01. What of the dudes? -Until now…
-How do I know? -Call then, bro.
-Let me call Danilo. -We’re late, bro.
-These dudes are keeping us. I’m calling, hold. Hello. Where are you, Danilo?
We’re here, bro. Guarulhos, bro? -Guarulhos… I think we came to…
-Fudge! -…Jundiai, bro.
-Pinch me, João. Macho, we’re flying there,
we’re going, wait! Give it to me, wait! Holy Mary. I’ll figure it out, thanks. Macho, pick it up… Hello, hey, Felipe. Macho, you need to do us a solid, can you come pick us up in Jundiai, bro? And take us to Guarulhos? Super-fast, bro! Life or death situation
for God’s sake. Yes? Please run for God’s sake. All right, we’re here, thanks. -He’s coming.
-Is he? -Thank God.
-Macho, for God’s sake, bro. I was finding it strange, no pilot.
How could we, bro? So, you don’t think that… There he is, Daddy. There he is. Let’s move it, come on. Calm down! Jesus. Tell him not to go that fast. Macho, we can’t be late.
We can’t lose this tour. Get in there, we’re late. If you want, there’s candy in there, sir. That’s Fiuk. Also known as: Geez, Fiuk? Why is Fiuk in my show? Yes, it’s Fiuk. Wait. Is this a show? So… Let’s hit it to Guarulhos, then. Slow down. With or without a rush? With a rush, pal. Then a rush it is, Daddy-o. Oh, my God, macho, that’s Fiuk! Dear God! Oh, my God! Oh, God. GUARULHOS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT Open the trunk, please? My God, this looks like a robbery. -Move.
-Move it! Let’s move, kid. We’re here, Frenchies. There it is. -The Eiffel Tower.
-The Wafers Tower. That’s Paris indeed, baby. Look at it. -It’s not a set.
-Not an antenna like those in São Paulo. Paris itself. Hey, Dani. Hey, The Great Whindeeersson Nunes! I’m here trying to buy some clothes,
but I can’t understand a thing. And I’m going into all the stores
without a clue. Are you coming or not? Can we meet?
I’ll text you the address so we meet. Just come, man. Just come. You can tell the dude is a player. Soccer Player -What’s up, abestado?
-All right. -All good, bro?
-What’s up? Abestados here. Three abestados in Paris. -We came for you to save us, bro.
-Look at us. -So we’ll be chic, too.
-Well, bro. I’m thinking of chic food. -Some snacks.
-You came to the place. Here is where you’ll find it.
Have you got cash? -Did you bring a lot?
-We’ve got about 100 euros. -We do.
-So you’re broke? -A hundred euros?
-If you convert, you can make it. A hundred euros is enough for underwear. -Is it good?
-That’s good. -So let’s buy some underwear then.
-Let’s go. -Here we go.
-We’re with you. You’re up to freelance
at the construction? We can make some bucks in here. If you freelance here
at the construction… -Maybe you get an extra 100.
-That’s dope. -Bonjour.
-There’s only chic stuff in here. -Bonjour, you know how to say.
-Bonjour. Back there in Piaui it’s different.
It’s biju. You are the… -That’s the one you call tapioca, right?
-What’s this street? Fella, this a street you can never come,
what of your wife? This is considered the vagrant street. I think we can find some stuff in there. There is some good stuff for us there. I’m scared of going in there. Here they don’t throw anything out
you see? Trash bags. -Geez, change your mind.
-A hundred euros? It’s like they called Power Rangers
from all over the world to make it. A hundred euros. That’s the one
from man’s first step on the moon. Shut up, macho. Price for a bike. You have crepon, you have it all. Put this on. Take a look. -That looks rich.
-Let’s see if it fits. What’s with this gift wrap here? It’s a gift indeed, well… Look, bro, look at it. Check it. Now listen up, that won’t work at a novena. If they’re all quiet there
and I’m dead there in the coffin, they’ll all go,
“Who’s eating chips?” How’s a fella going to
hide from his mom wearing this? -I’m crying here.
-If the woman catches you like this… -But you look like another person.
-At a party like a bag of chips. But you’re looking good, come on. Dude’s going to think
it’s raining all the time. Since we’re going to a chic place,
I wanted you to dress chic with us. Look at him here. -Check this out.
-Chic news. -Lino, during carnival…
-Imagine you arrive like this at dinner. I see,
it’s like a fireman from the future. I’m not even looking at you, sir,
just you. As you say it I’m looking at him,
“I’ll hit you hard.” I think we must rethink his look. -I’ll do it myself, thanks.
-Let’s test that look then. -Come on, let’s see.
-Let’s go test it. -Fashion week…
-Check that one, son. You’ve got some big balls there. Fashion week. Model’s parade.
Hold it now. So what? Let’s see. Now, change your position. Have you got 50 reais to change? You’ve got some big balls there. You want some chips? The guys arrived, heads up. Have you got Nesquik, nuts? -Brown coconut and all?
-All of it. We have it all. Careful now, if you tie your laces
like that you’ll fall. I think that’s the one. Do I take it off, keep it? How do you feel? -I’m feeling good.
-Yes? So take it off. That’s it, now. Now you’re like a little model. There’s a guy I’m curious
to know how’d he dress. Are you back there yet? Set up? Now we’re talking! Daredevil! Avelino, that’s… Awesome! To safeguard someone on Carnival,
that’s the deal. I’m here to work, not be dressing up in colorful outfits. Or fashionwear.
I felt like hitting João Neto. No, come on. Do you think so, Avelino? Get back to the original outfit, Avelino.
It suits you better. -But it looks cool.
-If anything changes… That’s it, Lino. I think he’s a little pissed. We made him to wear the chips clothes… Avelino’s a joking guy
but from what I can tell, he seems a little quiet around there,
maybe he got pissed, but it’s no big deal. I get really cross.
Avelino thinks I always set him up. He always goes, “I’ll hit João Neto,
I’ll get him, punch him,” but not Whindersson. Whindersson’s the saint, 01, the innocent. -At least for today you’re set.
-All set, Daddy-o. -I’ve got a little gift for you guys.
-A gift? -More?
-We’re Santa here, son. Santa’s here. You might miss this one. Get out of here. -That one is collection.
-To the collection. -So take both for it.
-Another one? That’s what I’m talking. But you have to get thin. -That thing is dry fit.
-Awesome, macho. -There you go.
-Enjoy your shopping. -Thank you, we’re tight.
-Thank you very much. -Always one.
-Full of bags in there. Thanks for the gift, Daddy-o. -Thanks, hugs.
-We’re tight. -Thank you, really.
-Let’s go. We’ll have a show tonight,
but not in Paris, guys. It’s back in Dublin, Ireland. Ireland… look how dumb I am. Ireland, 621 miles from here. So, off to the show, let’s move it. Can you repeat that last one in English? English, macho? All right. Let’s go… Hi the peoples.
Let’s go to Irlanda. Esto… and now. And the show is hoje. DUBLIN, IRELAND
NEXT STOP I like Dublin. It’s cool. Brazilians here are wild. They come here loaded already. The flashlight fades,
the music comes, you’re in. That’s in. Go for it, dude. Did the music come in? Where’s the microphone? -This microphone’s off.
-It’s dead. It’s on mute. Good evening, fellas. Hello! -Brazilians? How long have you lived here?
-Three years. Three long ones. Cleaning up toilets
to come see Whindersson Nunes. -For real?
-Yes. -What do you work with?
-We’re cleaners. -That’s awesome.
-Yes. -I came in 2000…
-We clean toilets like this… So I told the girls, let’s see if we try to get him outside the stage, -with the song, so we surprised him.
-And we recorded something for him. Awesome! We’re tight, fellas! See you all! -There’s still a lot left.
-There’s more, yes. It’s Whindersson, come on! Go there, quick! -Whindersson, we have a surprise.
-Where? Get lost, go spook the hell else. I thought Luisa was coming out of the car. Take that one! I know there are people
that stick to my comedy as something… That reminds them of home. And to us, it’s bigger. Because we’re married. So we know that in Brazil, we are afraid of being killed
in the streets. A while ago I was depressed, I said,
“Let’s watch Whindersson here.” I like to hear I help a little -with that kind of story.
-You help a lot. You think that maybe you have something or anyone to send something? I’ll take it. -Here.
-Who’re you sending it to? -So it’s for my younger brother.
-I’ll do it myself. -I will.
-He’ll pass out. A scarf. I’ll use it for now. -Suit yourself.
-So I can… I have many nephews, but one has just been accepted
at the uni and she’s on cloud nine. And I want to send it to her.
It’s Isabelle. Okay, I’ll send it to her, the gray one. And yours is for… Mine is for my younger brother Guilherme. And… gosh. -She gets emotional.
-He’s a person I… He goes through a lot in my family’s home, and he is the little diamond stone, you know, the one we tell, “Study so you can be someone.” Coming here and watching what you just did
back at that stage is priceless to us. Thank you, brother, honestly. We’re tight. We go home with mouths hurting
and full hearts. What a cute one! -Go with God, you deserve it.
-Amen, sweetheart. -Go with God yourselves, Godspeed.
-You too. Careful going back home and all. -Folks, thank you.
-Thanks, Daddy-o. We are here in Dublin, Ireland.
The land of drinks, my friends. And I’ve been doing some research, so I found Temple Bar. Said to be one of the best
here in Ireland. One of the best pubs, with more than 500 brands of liquor. I want to check this out
so I’ll go grab some, Daddy-o. Goodbye. Temple Bar. It’s respectable. And it’s beautiful, Daddy-o. Now’s time to pick it up
and drink it down. Here, so 15.80, please. -Fifty?
-15.80. Is 19,80 good? Good? I can sing this one! -Let’s go there! Are you up?
-Let’s go! One from Luan Santana! Listen, we can’t go there
because the folks… It’s not for foreigners. There are some people
beating the Brazilians. So I’ll stay here in my corner. At least I’m in one piece. I’m scared of even drinking it. What about me? I’ll stay put here. There’s a serious issue in Dublin, about the Knackers, who are assaulting foreigners. And since we didn’t know it, the place, I thought it was for the best if they didn’t dance for security reasons. Do you mind if I take a picture
of you outside of the bar? I have no idea of what she said,
but I think it’s a photo? A picture here. Avelino is pissed off. -He really is.
-I’m scared, look at his face. Have you heard of the debauchery
going on here, people that are beating Brazilians? -Who?
-There’s been some groups -that are beating up foreigners.
-Hail Mary. Look at that stuff. Lino made about 35 friends,
roughly already. -Tonight only.
-Everyone hugs Lino. Lino’s got fans, bro. Look, macho, Lino’s famous. Come here! Violence is over. Violence, no. Stop. Stop violence, please, no, no! -How’s that?
-No, no, violence no! Please stop violence! -What are you saying?
-Stop violence. Suit yourself, bro. -Look there.
-Holy Mary. This ends badly. -It ends bad, as we’re married.
-Stop it that I… Please don’t hit on me, folks. -I’m married, please.
-We’re married, we can’t… Sorry, but not possible. -Yeah.
-Yes! -Drink it up.
-Drink all the beer you want. But don’t come closer. Geez, someone will get beat up home. That’s why I’ll go like this. I’m flying sideways. Going away now. Take it easy! The ones that want, keep it up.
To me, it’s off limits. There’s the ring. -Mine too. Show it, please.
-It’s right here, just to keep it… -Step out of Guns N’ Roses, way, macho.
-Sorry, Guns N’ Roses. -Bye.
-Let’s split this up to call it a night. Cheers. Let’s get away to London, Daddy-o. I’m being myself. -I’m being myself.
-Don’t go peeing in the street! I’m being myself. Sure, but I need to empty myself, Avelino. Not here! But I’m used to it there
in Brazil, Avelino! If I don’t give them work,
how are people working in the street, bro? Hey, macho, careful, speak lower. Or you’ll get punched. You’re getting in the way
of the dude’s sleep. I’m not joking, really. Man, why did I do this to my life? NEXT STOP
LONDON, ENGLAND LONDON Good morning. Today we are… Tired, right? But we’re in London already. And I chose to do it here. Let me text a brother of mine. You’ll know who he is pretty soon. I’ll ask about visiting his house.
Hold on. COME TO MY PLACE THEN.
LET’S CATCH UP. TOSSED LIKE TRASH.
FEED AND SHELTER ME PLS
JUST COME AROUND. Look at the man’s house.
You’ve got to respect. Even Superman flies over. That’s it, here. Hey, David! Is it here? Look at his house number. -Hey, bro!
-Heya! I don’t want any old bread. -Can we come in?
-No. -It’s open, the gate.
-You can’t. If you break this one, imagine. Room service, sir. Hey, old chap! DAVID LUIZ
SOCCER PLAYER -How are you?
-All good. Please make yourself at home. -You, Daddy-o?
-All in peace? -All fine.
-You can even put a jacuzzi like Gugu’s. So how are you? -All good.
-I am tired, bro. David can crack your back
like no one else. -Relax.
-Hey, stop! -Relax, man, it’s good.
-Wait, it’s just you’re too big. -I’ll relax.
-Loose arms. -Relax.
-Slowly now. The arms are stiff.
You got something there? I’m not, I’m relaxed. -Geez, macho.
-Do it like this. I learned this one in Thailand. -What the heck!
-Now go up, put your hands down. -Leave me!
-Hey, sucker! One-zero, Daddy-o. You’re not coming losing one-zero. One-zero, Daddy-o. Come on, bro, they recorded it already. Everywhere we go,
the guys say we bring sun. Come on, don’t exaggerate now. You knew English when you got here? -Or…
-Not a word. -Nothing? But you learned on the way.
-Zero. If you don’t… You have to. It’s something good soccer… It let’s you know many cultures
and learning other languages. I was able to learn English here… Spanish as I played with many Spanish
and Argentinians. French at France… The Italian I’m perfecting now. Since my coach is Italian. I’ve been to Ceará… I’m speaking Cearanish? I’ve been through exchange at Piaui… -That’s dope.
-Look at that. It’s been 20 years. Now I’m in São Paulo. Do you dig me, asshole? Yeah, Gilmar. But not a word in English yet. How do you say bom dia? You know that. -What?
-Good tard. -Good tard…
-Good afternoon. -Isn’t it?
-That’s hard, bro. I’ve never played that one. Futmesa. -Teqball?
-That’s it? Futmesa, right? You win you get three tickets
to the show. Look at his flair. You play it to eat
as the bananas are ready. No, only two touches. -One-zero.
-One-zero to me. Let me help Fino. Two-to-zero! Close your legs, Daddy-o. Let’s make him crouch. Three-to-zero.
Come on, crouch. That one from Ceara talks a lot. -Play a little videogame?
-Let’s go. Table Tennis, bro. What Table Tennis? Be a man, fella. Let’s play some ball, now. Aren’t you the player, big shot? The professional?
Let’s see if you’re really good at that. I’m challenging you, David. Do what he does. Look at him and do it. -That’s right.
-You got to do it. What’s that? That’s the same.
This videogame does all the guy does. Is it like Gugu, you lose but you win? Because he does it. They lose, then “random babbling,
they won! A flip-flop machine.” -Compacta Print!
-Yeah, macho, that one, exactly. A mug machine. My hand’s shaking. -Shoot.
-Oh, heck! -Oh, no!
-Yeah! Respect my David Luiz. Pass it, Daddy-o. Take it away, yes! Does it have preservation? Preservation? It’s prorogation! -I almost died.
-Macho, it’s preservation. It’s off to preservation! -Is it golden goal?
-No. And that’s on already? What the hell? -He’s tormented.
-It was good. -Good one. You get it?
-My pleasure. -That’s it.
-You won it. We didn’t win the mugs, but… Sign it up for us to be nice. Four seconds to go, that’s it. The guy’s almost a teacher, bro. He’s got it right. -We’re tight.
-Bye, go with God. No photo, scram! Scram, come on! Move it bro, move it… That’s right. No, no! We are in the land of the Queen,
friends, London. And you know everyone is chic around here?
Kings, Queens, Dukes, Duchesses, Barons… All these chic folks. Since my pal Whindersson’s
becoming chic… I booked him an etiquette class. The poor beggar can barely eat
with a spoon, now he’ll eat with a thousand pieces
of silverware around. But he’s not alone in that one. -Here.
-Felipe is calling here. -Hey, Daddy-o. Where are you?
-Speak up, bro. I’m here at the hotel. I’m going to an etiquette class now. Real debauchery. Let’s go?
I’ll text it to you. So we meet up there. -Deal.
-Bye, Daddy-o. -Yo, macho.
-Daddy-o. FELIPE ARAUJO
SINGER -How’s it going?
-Good thing we caught up. It’s been about six years. I’ve been drinking it every day. -Look at it.
-Delicious. -Is it the one?
-He is the man. Dom Pedro XVI. -Hello.
-Hello. I got shy, sorry. -Is this how I sit?
-I’m shy, man. Please stand up. ETIQUETTE TEACHER You can’t drag it, macho. The lady… Sits down first. -Okay.
-I’m sorry. So I can sit now. -Are you left-handed?
-Yes. -Are you a lefty?
-No. -So you need to use your right.
-I see. -Like this?
-I asked if you were a lefty. All right, so this is a no. Sorry! Girlfriend, you always do that. Oh, geez. -So many rules.
-That’s so hot! There’s no way. You have to blow. Harry Potter! The sky is beautiful today. -Did you notice, girl?
-I did. Not a single cloud in it. What a sky. I can say I like your jacket.
It is very nice. I like your jacket, too. You like my jacket? I like your jacket, too. -I like my jacket.
-You like your jacket? I like your jacket very much. You need to take your hat off. I just remembered. -You’re always doing that, right?
-I just remembered. I think now it’s better
to the ones filming it. Do you find his hair nice? He asked about his hair. It could do with some work. Offer to the lady first, before you then offer to yourself, and then you offer to your friend. -Let’s go.
-To the woman and the elders… Let me grab it. -Do you want, girlfriend?
-Yes. Now we put that on top of it. Very messy, but that’s how you do it. And you can notice… Lots of etiquette
but the mess is the same. It all becomes a mess -as well, after.
-Just like home, amazing. -Amazing.
-Do you like it? I love your jacket. I love your jacket. -Amazing.
-What a beautiful sky. You are so funny. So on to the top. Well done! Well done. Would you like one, madam? You are too quick, madam. Thank you, my plate is very full. -Would you like?
-No, just a bit of peanut. -That’s all?
-The sky is beautiful. So do you have afternoon tea in Brazil? No, only when we are sick. Yeah, sick. -We didn’t finish eating yet.
-No, it’s good. Suit yourself then, take it. If I’m hot I can take off the coat? Yes. You can take, yes.
Take the jackets off. It is a bit hot, cooked over. The best thing I’ve learned, maybe… Was that they do things first. Yes, it’s always ladies first. You offer it to them,
then you pull the chair and all that. Yes, remember if there’s a lady here
she must come first. -If you want to impress her.
-Thank you. -Thank you, it’s been good fun.
-I like your… You like my jacket. So, let’s move out. -Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you. -I need you to stand up first so I can.
-Yes, right. -As long as you don’t stand we cannot.
-So that goes there. And I will get up. Thank you. -Now we can do again. Nice to meet you!
-Nice to meet you, too. -Look at me confidently.
-Nice to meet you. -Bye.
-Bye. The etiquette class
was a success, friends. As you saw yourselves. I couldn’t come for personal reasons, but Whindersson called me,
gave me some tips. So now I have perfect etiquette. Your jacket is so beautiful,
my cameraman. A very beautiful one, I like it. And let’s go to the show, friends.
Ladies first please. Let’s go Mr. 01. That’s done, 01. Thought he couldn’t take it. He did it, Daddy-o. The guy’s got a good spine. Funny thing is Avelino
carrying him and thinking, -Idiot.
-Ninety years of career… -Is it here?
-What do you think? My car is a red one… I use mirrors just to fix my hair. -Come first, man.
-Let’s move. I introduce you, Felipe Araujo and Whindersson Nunes! Very well. That’s right. He wants to join the crowd.
Mind the guitar! Good evening! Good evening, Daddy-o. Good evening!

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